BFF

Felix and Soren in matching Monkey shirts

What makes a friend for a 3 year old?  It's something I've been wondering about a lot as I've watched Felix navigate his social world and form connections with other kids.  Is it just who he happens to spend time with, or something more?  What does this mean for his friendships in the future?  Will he remember his first friends? 

 Nicholas and Felix playing under a tree

It became clear a little over a year ago that there were certain kids that Felix REALLY liked, and had similar energy to.  Since then he has stated his preferences more and more frequently, to the point that we're starting to work on helping him talk about the kids he doesn't feel in "sync" with as much, or does not see as much and have the chance to develop closeness with.  The new word for kids who he states are "not his friends", I've decided, are "pals".  I don't want to push the "everyone is your friend" thing, as I want to encourage his special connections with some kids, but I also want to help him develop language around friendship and community that is a more inclusive.

 Felix and Spencer on a dirt pile

Whatever the reason, whether it is natural attraction, the fact that their parent(s) are my friends, he sees them 3 days a week at school, or a mixture of all of these elements, Felix's preferences are clear.  I love the sweet silliness, the infectious laughter, and the pure joy on his face when he sees a special friend across the room, and the concentration on his face when he and a friend go deep into imaginary land.  At least, for now, there is still plenty of room for me, in the midst of his friendship mix.  And I am enjoying it while it lasts.

 Felix and Augie on the slide